Status: Drafting the fourth book in the PERILOUS series!

Tuesday, March 16, 2010


Sometimes, our husbands do things that make us wonder who they are. And sometimes, they do things that make us wonder how we got so lucky.

I just have to gloat about mine. Like all marriages (right?), ours has its ups and downs. But there are some things I can always count on: his generosity and his compassion.

For example. I wanted new maternity clothes. I don't have to ask, but I did. Of course he said, "Whatever makes you feel better." And he means it. If nicer clothes raise my self-esteem, then by all means, he wants me to have it.

Three days later I woke him up from his nap with, "Can I have $600?"

If it were me, I know I would've said, "Why?" or at least, "$600?? That's a lot of money!" But he didn't say either of those things. He didn't even say, "Yeah, if you give me back massages every Friday for the next year." All he said was, "Yes." That was it. I said, "Okay!" and giggled, and then he said, "What for?" I told him, "I want to go to a writer's conference in Utah and I need money for the plane and the hotel and the conference." His response? "Oh, of course you can. Take an extra $100 for shopping."

Silly man. I'm not going shopping.

Granted, his response might not have been so mellow if we weren't getting back a very nice tax return. But even so, I'm trying so hard to be as generous as him. I have the tendency to question every time he spends $20 on candy at the grocery store. And it makes me feel like a horrible nagging wife, especially when he is so kind to me.

But yesterday took the cake. After our oldest's soccer game, we went to Fun City (kind of like Chuck E Cheese, but bigger and cheaper!). We'd been planning this all weekend. All of the sudden, in the middle of the soccer game, the rorovirus attacked me. I didn't know that was what it was, but I spent all of Fun City in the bathroom, vomiting and--er--you know.

My parents were with us. They offered to take the kids and Mark took me home, with me throwing up in a plastic bag the whole way there.

There's something about having the flu. You forget how bad it is unless you're in the throes of it. You don't realize how it jerks your whole body forward, giving you whiplash. You don't remember that you grip the toilet, trembling, gasping, shaking, frothing at the mouth, thinking you are going to die.

Through this whole ordeal, my husband was right there (well, except when I was in the girl's bathroom). He stroked my arm, wiped my mouth, pulled back my hair. He helped into my pajamas, helped me get my contacts out, and tucked me into bed. He brought me a water bottle in case I got thirsty, gave me extra blankets, called all of my commitments/appointments and told them I was sick. Then he and my dad gave me a blessing that I would get better quickly.

Today I woke up feeling weak and shaky, but not nauseous (I know, the correct term is nauseated, but that sounds wrong!). And I am full of gratitude to my husband. He deserves some kind of metal.

What can I do to reward this man? What would you do? What has yours done for you that made you feel special?


Talli Roland said...

Aw! What a great husband. I feel really grateful for mine, too, for supporting my writing journey 100 per cent even though I'm not contributing anything to our finances! I give him a lot of 'surprise' cards and homemade gifts.

sarahjayne smythe said...

What a great guy. You two must be so cute together. If he's anything like my husband, honestly, you make him happy by being you. :)

Sara McClung ♥ said...

Aw, I heart your husband =)

I can think of ways for you to reward him, but I'm not entirely sure they're appropriate to post!

Or, make good on your offer for those Friday night massages!

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

Talli--that is so important. I hear all the time about the frustration spouses have with their absent, writing spouse. But mine really does support me so much!

Sarahjayne--sounds like your husband is also a great guy!

Sara--you know what's odd, is his 'drive' seems to go down when mine does in pregnancy. Convenient, I know! But I'll offer him that massage!

Anonymous said...

Oooh yeah. I've been there. And MrIcy was pretty wonderful too.

M. Gray said...

Oh, girl! I'm so sorry you've been sick!! I had no clue! My kids got it last week and over the weekend. It lasted forever this time with my son. Great man!!!

Lluvia said...

You have a wonderful husband! I love it when mine does nice things like that!!

Pretty much he doesn't want anything back unless it has to do with gratitude sex. Yep. I said it.

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

Icy--so good to know there are sweet men out there!

Mary--It didn't last long! Just last night, mostly. I'm pretty much okay today!

Ha ha, LMJ!

Jay said...

Tamara - my wife won't let me near her contact lenses. :-) Now, I'm a pretty good husband.. I think. But, dang, Mark! Making us all look bad. *shakes head*

Quick story-

One evening after Thanksgiving several years ago, my wife really wasn't feeling well, thought she was going to throw up, so, being the excellent hubby that I am, said, "Honey, let me get you the Pepto Bismol!"

She shouted, "No, I hate that stuff. It's awful."

I brought over the bottle with the pink stuff.

She took one look at the bottle, then said, "Oh, thank you. I think I can throw up now!"

And she ran off to the bathroom and did just that.

See? I waved a bottle of icky medicine and helped the wife out.

Tahereh said...

this was really sweet post. really, really sweet. thanks so much for sharing. it makes you think twice about a lot of things and remember to be grateful. also -- you have a great voice. the post was written in a great narrative style -- i'm sure your book will do really well!

congrats with everything, and best of luck with your writing!!

Elisa said...

sorry you were sick. I hate throwing up. I also hate the way it taints certain foods for me after that. Hopefully you only ate something you didn't really plan to make again anyway. :)

and glad Mark is supportive of your trip to the writer's conference! He's such an understanding husband. :)

Melanie J said...

Sounds like you got yourself a good one!

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

Jay--that post about your wife was hilarious!

Tahereh--I hope so! We'll see how great my style is when my book comes out--hopefully in a few months!

Elisa--it was the flu. Not food poisoning. So luckily there are no food items I have to stop eating.

Melanie--I did!

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