When I first submitted Perilous, I intended for it to be an inspirational Christian novel about four girls who had to learn to rely on Christ so they could heal for their tragedy. We ended up taking out the religious aspect and turning it into a thriller. No one could be more shocked than I that I had written a thriller. :)
While I am pleased with the fast-paced end result, some of these introspective, faith-building scenes were hard to let go of. Here is one where Jaci and Sara talk about what they've been through and how to let it go. This scene is especially poignant for Sara, who has the hardest time recovering from the kidnapping.
Jaci finished the dishes. Drying her hands, she picked up the lamp and headed for bed. She walked out of the kitchen and through the large parlor, past the brown piano and white pillars.
She paused as she walked past the back door. She thought she’d seen Sara out on the deck. She opened the door and stepped outside, allowing the lamp to light her way.
It was Sara. Sara didn’t answer, just leaned out over the railing. Jaci hurried over, each step creaking as she walked across the old wood. “Sara, are you okay?” She remembered Sara’s response last time and felt dumb for asking.
Sara shook her head. She took a deep breath and stood tall, straightening her back. Jaci put an arm around her.
"It’s okay, Sara. Whatever’s wrong, you can tell me. You need to talk.”
“I don’t want to talk, Jaci. I feel so alone. I’m so frustrated. So angry.”
“Sara. We love you. We’re here for you, even if you never say a word about anything, we care. And Heavenly Father cares.”
Sara shook her head. “I don’t feel Him. I don’t think He cares.”
Jaci held back a gasp of surprise. After their escape, and the old man's rescue... “How can you say that?”
Sara laughed, a harsh, bitter sound. “You go through what I’ve been through and you’ll know how I can say that. How could he let that happen to me? What did I do that was so wrong?”
“Do you still pray, Sara?”
“Of course. Why would I stop?”
“Well, of course I am too. I just don’t feel anything in response. My heart, my soul, it’s empty. It’s like it’s been taken from me.”
Jaci squeezed Sara's hand. “The Savior will take away your pain. Let him have it.”
“I’m waiting.” Sara reached up and brushed away the tears. “Maybe I just don’t have enough faith.”
Jaci wrapped her arms around her. “Sara. Give yourself some time. He will take your burden from you.”
“He’s taken everything else from me,” she sobbed into Jaci’s shoulder. “He may as well take that too.”