For a very important date.
A due date, that is, which has come and gone.
I've never been late before, and it's very much driving me nuts. Logically, I realize a woman can't be pregnant forever. This baby must come out. But how can she still be sitting in there, so tight and cozy, when her date has come and gone? I feel like she's becoming an eternal part of me and will never leave.
Before everyone starts giving me advice for encouraging her exit, I've already heard and probably already tried it. Multiple times, because even if she wasn't ready three days ago, she might be now, right?
People keep saying wonderfully observant things like, "You're still pregnant!" Oh, is that what the problem is? I wasn't sure. Or this one: "Are you having contractions?" Yes, and I have been for three weeks. Would you like to know my sleep patterns as well? But this one's the worst: "How are you feeling?" Take a guess. Take a wild guess. I'm overweight with a painful contracting watermelon in my belly, I don't sleep well, my feet, hands, and face are swollen, I can't bend over, everything aches--how do you think I'm feeling?
About the only thing you can say to me is, "I'm so sorry." And then move on. Let's turn the conversation another direction.
I try to keep myself distracted by filling my calendar with events, but as each day approaches, I secretly hope I'll have to cancel because I have a new baby. As much as I love my writer's group, I'm not thrilled that I'll be making it to our meeting tonight. As close as the airport is, I'm not excited that I'm available to give my mom a ride. Even though I planned out our dinner menu for the week, I wish I wasn't cooking it. It's great to get these things accomplished, but I wish I couldn't.
For you on the outside looking in, you know with an even clearer head than I that it's only a matter of days. She will come. And I'll be glad I got so much done before she got here. So what's the big deal?
Well... if you've ever been late, I'm sure you know.
Since I'm still pregnant, my goal today is to tally up the blog tour points and get those posted! Oh, and Inevitable goes free for ONE DAY ONLY tomorrow! I'll give you links tomorrow!