Scandal at the Library

Sometimes I think I'm never going out in public with my children again. Especially the library.

Last week I took my two children into the library with me and we started loading up our basket. We always grab a handful of movies, several children's books, and a few books for me. I always wish I had a shopping cart because carrying the little one and two bags of heavy books makes for an awkward visit.

There's one particular librarian who either doesn't like me or doesn't like my children. Or both. One time during story time, Asher walked up to the front of the group so he could stare at the book up close. Too close. She called me to come and get him. Ouch.

My library has only one check-out counter and seven self-check-out machines. I love them, they're so easy. But they require both hands. I got in the habit of putting Asher on the counter next to me while I 'rang up' my books and put them in their plastic sack. Until said librarian got on to me for having him up there. Now I hook my legs around him while I check out.

Another time when Jacen was in story time, Asher was being so disruptive that the story teller asked me to take him in the hall. She knew Jacen and assured me he would be fine.

Apparently after I left Jacen needed a drink of water. Story teller told him to go ahead, not realizing he didn't know where it was. He wandered around until the Librarian found him and brought him to me, telling me he's too young to be left by himself in the library.

Urg.

Granted, my kids are disruptive. They definitely are. And on this particular day a week ago, Asher gave me a big grin and took off.

Jacen was sitting quietly, playing with a puzzle. I said, "Jacen, I need to get Asher. Can you sit right here and wait for me?"

"Uh-huh," he said.

"I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere."

"Okay."

Sure.

I managed to swoop in and catch Asher before he exited the building. I scold him and head back. Only to find--you guessed it--the Librarian approaching, stern expression on face, Jacen's hand in hers.

I seriously wanted to melt into a puddle and disappear.

I looked at Jacen and said, "Jacen! I told you to wait!"

She said, "He was standing in middle of the reading center, calling you." Wow, if her voice was any icier, I would have become a popsicle.

Well, you know what, it suddenly irritated me that this woman was chastising me. I'm sure she knows who I am and thinks I'm the worst mother. My kids are the terrors of the library. But I bristled up and said, "Well, I couldn't exactly hear him from the bathroom."

We all know I wasn't in the bathroom; I was chasing my 1-year-old. But the exit and the bathrooms are right next to each other. I had a baby in my arms and a diaper bag over my shoulder. She didn't know I wasn't in the restroom. She handed Jacen to me and I fled, vowing never to return again with my children. Or without a hat and trench coat.

Oh, how embarrassing.

Do you have any places you've vowed not to return to until after dying your hair and getting a new face?