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Status: Drafting the fourth book in the PERILOUS series!

Monday, April 5, 2010

The Gig's Up

I'm on to you.

Sometime over the weekend, one of you replaced my 4-year-old with a demon look-alike.

Did you think I wouldn't notice? No child of mine would poke holes in all the screens with a screw-driver. Or pee in his toy chest instead of going to the bathroom. Or hide under the grocery cart at the store and eat stolen candy.

Ha ha. Very funny. April Fool's is over. I'd like my child back now, please. NOW.

24 comments:

Kate said...

Oh no! What a weekend. I hope things improve.

Vicky said...

Whoa. That's some pretty insane trickery.

Amber said...

wow, that's hilarious to read about...but I know living it is a totally different story! haha

Jemi Fraser said...

Yikes! Been there - things do get better! Good luck -- and eat some ears off a couple of bunnies - great therapy!

Melissa J. Cunningham said...

I'm sorry to break the bad new but your child is possessed. It happens to all children at about 3 years old, give or take.

Welcome to my world!

Talli Roland said...

It was me! I did it! I had a great weekend with your angel of a four year old. But seeing as how you're his mum and all... here. You can have him back. :(

*LLUVIA* said...

Oh boy! I'd be demanding my child back too!!

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

Ah, Melissa! I'm dying laughing. Maybe this mom thing wasn't what I signed up for, after all.

Kate--I know, can you believe it??? That was just the weekend!

Vicky--insane, yes. I want to know who's responsible for this!

Amber--I'm to the point where I can laugh about it.

All right, Jemi gave me permission to eat bunny ears!

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

Talli!!! Anyone who can get 100 bloggers in one month has something up her sleeve. I should have suspected you! You better have him back in his bed when nap time is over...or else!!

LMJ--dont' worry, I don't think girls can be in their toy chest. Not easily, anyway.

Voidwalker said...

LOLOLOL... that's terrible, but funny.

Jen said...

Bahahaha the kid is possessed for sure or addicted to chocolate to have to hide under the grocery cart to eat it! Someone call an intervention!!

Sara McClung ♥ said...

LOL omg. I'm sorry for YOU, but for ME? that's hysterical =)

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

So glad I could provide a few laughs! This is real life folks...it doesn't get any funnier!

sarahjayne smythe said...

I'm sorry. I'm laughing here, too. I know how terrible it is, but this just takes me back to the good old days with my own kids. Oh, yeah. Good times. :)

Jay said...

Sorry, Tamara. You know how some folks call children, "little imps"? Now you know why. MWAHAHAHAHA!!!! Does it improve? Of course! Um, sort of. Okay, not really, but it changes. They're like little shapeshifters. Fun, evil, hilarious, nasty, adorable little shapeshifters.

Roland D. Yeomans said...

I cannot tell a lie. It's global warming. No such luck. It's the circle of life. Your only revenge will be far in the future when your grown child wails about the perils of 4 year olds.

Thanks for the kind comments on my first page. They were deeply appreciated, Roland

M. Gray said...

HA! Glad to know my kiddos aren't the only animals.

Melanie J said...

Ohhhhhhh, dear.

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

Seriously, Sarahjayne, you actually MISS these days?

Jay, you better not put this in one of your books!

Roland, I think that's why grandparents exist...

Well, Mary, I'm happy to know that my child not uniquely demonic!

Oh Melanie, you've got boys! I'm sure you can tell stories!

Stephanie Faris said...

LOL. Well...it's a new era, I guess?

Mary Campbell said...

I feel your pain - just this past week my 2yo broke 5 raw eggs on my carpet, dumped two full bottles of catsup on the carpet, wrote all over the walls, spread boiled egg yokes throughout, hid husband's wallet and my keys. We've found hubbie's wallet, I'm still looking for my keys. This is what comes from blogging while he's awake.

Nisa said...

Oh my dear, I am so sorry!

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

yikes, Mary! someone has possessed our children!

MT said...

Woo. You know, when he's grown and his kids do it, you'll get this nice little satisfied laugh come bubbling up out of nowhere. :)

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