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Status: Drafting the fourth book in the PERILOUS series!

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Fighting the Black Cloud of Gloom

I didn't get a letter all week from Mark. This had a very sad affect on my mood this week. But he's been able to call me every weekend for the past two months, so I set my sights on today. Yesterday I was positively jubilant, an emotion not easily come by lately.

The drill sergeants haven't given them their phones.

I am not a depressed person, but I'm reaching the end of my rope. I miss my husband too much. I put too much stock in today's phone call, and now I'm sinking because it doesn't look like I'll get one. I'm trying very hard to pull myself out of this, because I need to start cleaning the house and feed lunch to my children. (So far, I've sliced up a couple pieces of cheese and given them a bowl of frosted flakes. Sans milk.)

I feel like a weak person for feeling this way, because I know many women who are without their husbands for more than a year, in a dangerous combat situation. That's not me. He'll be home in a week. But I can't shake the dread of trying to get through this week with no contact from him.

Writing is my escape. I can't wait to sit down and write.

Sequel Stats:
today's goal: 53,544
actual: 53,722
Monday's goal: 55,722

10 comments:

Mary Gray said...

I'm so sorry Tamara. One week. One week. You can do this. And I am glad you have found an escape to recharge! Sometimes I channel frustrations into my writing and can make something more powerful that way. Maybe an idea?

Lothiriel said...

My husband travels a lot (he's not in the military), and is hardly home. I always miss him. I can relate to feeling a little sad without him.

I admire all those wives whose husbands are out there in Iraq. That must be very nerve-wrecking.

It is so great when you're at the airport waiting, and then he steps out of the escalator with his suitcase smiling at you as he slides down. It seems like an eternity before you can run to him and hug him tightly.

My hubby came home yesterday and it was so good to see him after a week.

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

Thank you ladies, for understanding.

I'll just hang on to that thought, that moment when we get to see him. Six more days.

Vicky B said...

Oh, sweetie. I'm sorry. I can't imagine what that's like. Just hang in there for anther week!

Karen Jones Gowen said...

Ah human nature...you were doing okay until the time is nearly up, and then one week seems like a lifetime...

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

Karen--I know! When I wrote Mark, I said if I could describe the feeling, I'd call it 'trunky.' Just knowing the time is almost over makes it that much harder!!!

Six more days. If I can just make it...

Stephanie Faris said...

One week...that's good news. I'm so sorry you're having to wait. It does seem the closer you get to the end of something like this, the harder it is to wait. Someone once compared it to horses out running. Often they'll start going really fast when they see the barn. You're seeing the barn and you want to run toward it but you can't.

JennyMac said...

Hang in there...sending positive thoughts your way.

And I have awards for you! Put on your dancing shoes and come over to the Awards bash.

Tamara Hart Heiner said...

awards for me?? Okay, I gotta check this out.

Carrie Harris said...

*hug* I hope this week flies.

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